About.

Yes, I took this myself. Yes, I realize that's lame.

I really like experimental fiction.  I also really like arguing, face paint, those metal things you can put your hand into and it’ll form a print of your hand with dull needles, firm pillows, dresses, funnel cakes, bird necklaces, alice in chains, flip-flops, car chase/crash film scenes, apple corers, conspiracy theorists, trashing my car, moving, making anarchy cows, driving with jelly fish, stickering my dashboard with miniature bob dylan promo stickers, heavy metal, people who can make jazz sounds with their mouth (skiddle de bop du bop woehowow),  watching someone assemble a tent when they don’t know how, flailing in any form, following flies when they’re too weak to fly and about to die, getting long necklaces caught on things and nearly beheading myself, the reenactment parts of shows about wilderness survival, putting hangers on my feet and walking like a hanger-foot, firing off unnecessary one-liners at inappropriate times, asking ‘who does that?’ when the answer is always the person I’m talking about, having socd (shallow obsessive compulsive disorder), trying to find the best looking person in the airport and pray that he’ll be seated next to me without remembering that this never (ever) happens, jack smith, when people accidentally eat dog biscuits, ‘zines, describing inanimate objects as being psycho, the color magenta because it sounds illicit, misprinted books with upside down covers, cappuccinos, pretending like I know something that I don’t and pulling it off so the other person thinks I did all along, gerbils when they escape from their cages and hide under radiators, michael martone, ghost stories, making outlandish claims, playing dumb kid board games like Mouse Trap! and Don’t Break the Ice!, pulling up my pants like an old man, possessing a loud silence, making square face sound effects, inner turmoil, brooches of animals with missing eyes, the word ‘dearth,’ not laughing when someone shows me a YouTube video, watching shows like Eureka (bad ones), jotting notes on everything around me like the guy from Memento, singing like an old man trying to sing like frank sinatra, arguing with toddlers, staring at people until they ask ‘what’ because they’re uncomfortable, those slimy hand things you get for 25 cents that stick to the wall, ugly couches, john walsh (yes, from america’s most wanted), electric sheep, e.e. cummings, ticket-rippers at movie theaters, kids who have skates on their shoes and run into things accidentally, the green bag infomercials, checking my e-mail outside of the donut shop because I’m too cheap to buy Internet and the people I used to steal it from finally put a password on theirs, nutcrackers dressed up like ringo star (it exists), self-deprecating people, USING CAPITALS TO CYBER YELL, doing impersonations, people who laugh when horrible things happen because they have some kind of emotional deficiency, experimental film/music/identities, towel shopping, bathroom jokes, being late, I dunno, a lot of things.